Friday, May 29, 2009

A Week of Being Closer

There are times when living across the ocean from all your friends and family is a great thing. Like when you don't want to get involved in petty squabbles over silly things or when the thought of having to go to another family party with your uncle-twice removed makes you break out in a cold sweat. The excuse of being on another continent comes in handy.

But there are also times when it down right sucks that you live so far away. And the only person you can blame for this suckiness is yourself.

I have no regrets in the places I've lived or the world I've seen, but I hold myself responsible for the miles between me and my family. I chose to wander and meander, thinking it would always be easy to get back "home" when I needed to. And it was, until my definition of "home" changed.

Spending last week with my sister, her husband, and our friend filled me with such happiness. Laughing at old stories, comparing notes on children and old friend's children, watching Hubster and my brother-in-law find solace in the fact that both their wives are nuts was wonderful. I admit to feeling like I've made a mistake living so far away. Especially this week with my mother's birthday and my oldest niece graduating from high school. Momentous occasions that should be celebrated en famille. Which they were, just without my branch.

Melancholy can strike even in spring.

But then my Hubster came home last night from work, he laughed with our kids at the dinner table, splashed with Bubba-Love in the bath, and rocked Whoops while staring out at our back garden. He sat with me in our house and, tired as we are, he made me smile and laugh. His presence reminded me that home is where my heart is and that's right here.

I miss my family and I'm so grateful for the efforts they make to stay close. I think they know that my heart was always searching for it's own place and now that I've finally found it, the miles don't matter all that much.

If only we could win the lottery to pay for the bloody airline tickets to cross those miles more often.


magali said...

if you win the good loto you could even buy a business jet or a Raphale, they seem to be on sales lately ;-p

I know it's not the same, but you all are a big part of my extended family now.

kissmekaty said...

Normal people CAN win the lottery, we know that personally! xoxoxox

As you get older and wiser, you realize that you can 'pick' your family. I love your family and am glad that you are a part of mine! xoxoxoxo

Kitty said...

Well, we love the place you are living - just wish it wasn't so far away!

Sue said...

You were there in spirit (and via facebook)!

Diane said...

The good thing is that when we are all together, it is like we have never been apart. Except for how much bigger all the kids are. I am going to be a religious buyer of lotto tickets because I miss my sister her husband and all their crew.

Sue said...

We missed you last night...after 9 hours of graduation party, we had six beers left. Hmmm...just enough for the two of you.

Dig said...

I think 6 beers between us would have be fine. Darn it all.