I'm heading into the big city tonight for the annual running race. I'm meeting up with the Beautiful Version of Julia Child and the Non-Footballer's Wife to try and haul my butt 3 times around the town. Overall, if I can hold it together, it could be a nice 10K on a June evening with friends. If I can't, well, I'm not sure I'm all that worried about it.
My running has changed over time and I'm finding my motivation for this race to be way different than it was a couple of years ago. Then, I would have trained harder, plotted my strategy and hoped like hell that I would finish the course between 55-60 minutes.
Tonight, I really don't care.
What's changed this? Four children? My age? A new found love for trails?
The truth is, I like to run because I can. I like to run because it reminds me that I make choices for me and about me. I like to run because every time I take a step, I get rid of the bullshit in my life. I don't worry about the bathrooms being clean, I don't worry about matching socks, I'm not worried about what to make for dinner.
When my foot hits the road or trail, I'm looking around me, taking it all in, be it the beautiful countryside or the glow of a city on a summer's evening. My body, shaped as it is, was made to move and since I have no dancing rhythm what so ever, I embrace the running wog/plod that is uniquely mine. The beat of my drummer, erratic as it is, suits my pace perfectly.
I'm looking forward to tonight. A chance to be around other people who might be a wee bit more competitive than me, others who might be a wee bit slower than me, but all of us just out there to run. A big sweaty mass of humanity not thinking about laundry.