Sunday, March 29, 2009

The Kicker Being That I Actually Like Her

I'm having one of those weeks where I just feel like nothing is going right. I'm a ball of emotions tied tightly by a string of grumpy yelling and frustration. Everything is setting me off, making me nuts, causing me to cry at the slightest thing, like trying to put Bubba-Love down for nap, and then two seconds later, I end up being super pissed off because all the milk is gone.

Truth being told, I think being 35 weeks pregnant is effecting me in more ways than I'd like to admit.

To make matters worse, I made my mother-in-law cry today. The sweet thing has been bed-ridden, suffering from severe sciatic pain since before Christmas and nothing seems to be helping. The latest recommendation from the doctors and physical therapists was to try a session of therapy in the pool. My father-in-law had said it sounded like a good idea but my mother-in-law wasn't too sure. When he handed the phone to her, the first thing out of my mouth was,

"Hey, what's with the pool thing? You really should do this, you know. The pool is the best place for you. You've got to keep moving or this is just going to get worse" or something along those really supportive lines. Something very "know-it-all," unsympathetic and down right pushy.

Her response was tears.

Enter Catholic guilt for about the 254, 587, 458 time this week.

I think I've mentioned before how I actually like my in-laws. How I actually feel lucky to be of that minority that likes spending time with her set of in-laws, one who loves having them on my side when I'm pissed off at Hubster, and one who just enjoys them for who they are. I take no joy in upsetting them and the last thing I would ever want to do would be to intentionally make them cry.

Doing just that has been the icing on the horrible grumpy cake I'm making this week. It's got an ingredient list that starts with insomnia, a dash of back ache, a lack of patience, and at least two cups of tears. Throw in an obnoxious attitude and a desire to piss off your loved ones, then beat till you can't feel your arms anymore. Bake till burned and serve next to a slice of humble pie.

I only hope I can really explain to my mother-in-law that I just want her to get better. I need her up and feisty, back to being the tornado I've come to cherish and love so much.

As for me, I'm off to get more milk. I think I'm going to need it to wash down that cake.


Kelly said...

Take it easy on yourself, Karen. But I have to say that I know all too well the Catholic guilt thing. Our lives are ruled by it!

Sending patient, good thoughts your way, hon. This too shall pass, and soon you can laugh about it. Maybe when you're at last holding Whoopsie...

Diane said...

Isn't if funny how you can shake off the Catholic, but not the guilt?

Annie knows you love her. And I am sure she, maybe more then many, remembers all the emotions of pregnancy. And you know what,she needs to get in that pool.

Sue said...

It is Lent so perhaps that whole Catholic DNA thing is more prevalent these days. Maybe we should have given it up for Lent. Anyway, you told Annie what you thought. She expects that of you and she loves you for it (as do all of us). In the meantime, follow that advice yourself...get in the pool to help relieve stress.

RHB said...

Love you- praying for you!And I can relate to being way over the edge but I can't even use the pregnancy card to cover my behavior and it's been months now.

hubster dave said...

hadn't noticed any difference to normal... ;-)